(TW: cissexism)

thechronicleofshe:

viviandemilo:

thechronicleofshe:

viviandemilo:

I’m working on getting my presentation to match my gender, instead of just wearing whatever strikes my fancy and doing my makeup however I please. It’s sad and necessary. I’m invisible in my beloved dresses and painted face, I never have a chance. I’m a tender coward and my feeble hints go completely unheard in the face of their roaring ignorance. They think I’m trying to be ‘cute’. I tell people outright and they still won’t hear me. It’s becoming harder and harder to speak to them at all. I’m becoming less and less productive and more lethargic and weak.

Gurl your cheekbones are to-die-for. 

UGH, you’re going to call me ‘gurl’ RIGHT UNDER a rant about how much it’s bothering me to constantly be misgendered? :(

So. First off, I didn’t mean to misgender you. My sincererest apologies 

Secondly, I don’t know you. I don’t know you at all. So, leap into my shoes for a second and hear me out. If you re-read your paragraph and approach it with absolute blindness of you and your situation, it could either be a rant about how you as a male sexed but female gendered person wish you could wear dresses. Or it could be a rant about how you as a female sexed but male gendered person loves wearing dresses, but dislikes how while wearing dresses people can’t tell that you’re male gendered. I just happened to guess the wrong one. 

I honestly thought you were mtf trans and in my experience “Gurl” is used to apply to femme identifying persons of any gender; though based on your reaction I’ll have to re-assess my usage of it.

But again, My apologies for misgendering you, regardless of the situation/semantics malarkey that just occurred. 

And hopefully, with that out of the way, we can concentrate on how ridiculous amazing you are at makeup and your fantastic eyebrows and your amazingly adorable haircut. 

:I

….Sigh. You need to learn some things: ”Sex” as you are using the word is a bullshit, non-scientific, cissexist concept. It’s hurtful, and a pure fantasy. People invented it, it doesn’t exist except as a word in the dictionary. Got it? DO NOT say someone who is female is ”male sexed”, EVER, just because they have a penis. This is wrong. The gender someone identifies as IS THEIR GENDER. Stop referring to trans people in any way by the gender they were assigned at birth. Just say ‘trans woman’, ‘trans man’, or ‘trans person’. Or, y’know, just PERSON.

‘mtf’ and ‘ftm’ are cissexist and you aren’t allowed to use them unless someone wants to be described that way. Many don’t. It implies that trans people start as one gender then turn into another, this is not true (except sometimes for genderfluid folks).

Femme does not = female.

NEVER ASSUME SOMEONES GENDER.